Say YES to Peace & Joy for the Holidays!

For many people, the holidays are a very joyous time. And, then there are many people that are looking forward to January 2010! Preparing for the holidays for those people may be a stressful time with visions of being with family members whom you don’t necessarily enjoy being around; and visions of crowded malls and parking lots, or eating too much unhealthy food, or maybe the thought of Uncle Rob drinking too much and making embarrassing comments adds some tension to your life. And, we may be missing loved ones during this season or concerned about money matters too.

How can we smile though the Holidays?

#1 Lets create your most joyous holiday intention and vision. Write down your intentions for the holiday. Include in your vision:

How do you want to feel? What would bring the most joy to your heart?
Where are you? Can you choose to spend the holiday is the most peaceful place for you?
Who are you CHOOSING to be with? What foods are you preparing or eating?
What does the energy feel like? Can you hear the holiday music? How does it make you feel? Are you laughing?
Are you playing games? Are you going for a family walk? Who are you talking to?
Are you singing songs? Are you playing outside? Are you going around the table and sharing what you’re thankful for this year? Are you in nature?
Are you playing fun table question games such as:
What is your most joyful memory in 2009?
What do you love most about your life and your family/friends?
What are you most grateful for in your life?

If you’re missing a loved one, it may feel good to share fond memories that you have had with her or him with others. It may feel comforting to imagine speaking directly to them as if they can hear and see you, and I believe they can. 🙂

How can you make this story happen? What action steps can you take to create this beautiful story? Please keep in mind you always have a choice of doing something different for the holidays. And, you have a choice which invitations you would like to accept and who you would like to invite. If you are the one hosting the family, make things a little less stressful on yourself.
• Allow others to help you by assigning tasks to family and friends.
• Have others bring a meal, a dessert or games.
• Prepare your meal and shopping in advance before the crowds.
• Play relaxing music with soy candles while you’re preparing your home festivities.
• Shop online to get out of holiday hustle and bustle.
• Drive or fly to your destination during off peak travel days.
• If you are going to someone’s home, ask if you can prepare one of your favorite dishes.
• If you are along, and don’t want to be, volunteer or visit a church or temple service.

Giving to others is always so much fun! Invite someone to your home who doesn’t have family, visit children in a hospital, pay the toll for someone behind you as you’re driving, or find away to help a charity.

If money is a concern, homemade gifts make wonderful presents. Another option is to offer a home cooked meal, give homemade healthy cookies wrapped up nicely, create gift certificates and write fun things on them such as, “good for four hours of babysitting, good or a one hour massage, or walking your dog”, use your talents and skills to create a gift, such as if you’re an artist, paint a picture. Check out this site for more tip ideas:

#2 Let’s look at your potential concerns.

List each of your concerns or the things that bring you the most stress and rate them on scale of 1-10, 10 being the worst feeling. Read the information below and see if this applies to any of your concerns. After reading this, if your concerns are still just as strong then you may re-consider your holiday choices by alleviating the items that bring your the most stress. You always how the choice of saying, YES to peace and joy!

Here is a fictitious example: You don’t find it enjoyable to be around your brother in law Joe. Your brother in-law Joe is a know it all. He thinks he knows everything about everything and just doesn’t stop talking. Okay, fair enough. Let’s put that aside. Now let’s find that soft spot for Joe. Can this be an opportunity for you to have tolerance for someone different than you? Can you learn to be open to someone with different views, different way of thinking, and different level of consciousness or sense of humor? Can you hold space for him being exactly who he is without allowing his “being” to take you out of a space of peace? Can you hold your power within yourself and not feel threatened by him? Maybe, it’s time for you to use your voice and speak through your heart with Joe. The truth is, instead of listing all of the reasons that Joe is “wrong” as a human being, can he just BE who he is? Take a big breathe. What is he good at? How does he bring love into your family?
EFT, Emotional Freedom Technique is a great way to balance out your energy.

I can remember when I was younger saying, “How am I a part of my family?” And, you have heard the saying, “You can pick your friends but not your family.” That’s not really true. We do choose our family. When we are in spirit form before coming to earth, we choose our family based on the individual family members that will assist us in our life learning lessons and life purpose and who we are meant to help too. We are helping each other embrace and love more parts of our self. Our biggest adversary in life is our biggest gift. Underneath our anger we are learning when and how, and why we give our power away to others.

I had the epiphany that my brother who always hated that I was born– and as a child he would throw me down and actually hit me quit often and we continued fighting through high school. I realized that bless his heart, he was gifting me inner strength, toughness, and courage!!! I’m grateful to him! I don’t spend my daily life with him; we are in two different states. And, we speak roughly two to three times per month, I do love him very much and I do not harbor any anger. And that is the meaning of, “others are our teachers”! And, we are teachers for others too.

Now go back to your list of concerns and see if you can have a new perspective and see if your numbers on your rating scale have changed.
If you are alone for the holiday, and you really don’t want to be, let others know and give them the opportunity to invite you into their family festivities. And, you can consider volunteering at a local shelter or go to a church service.

Choose love over hate, peace over stress, right over wrong, authenticity over a lie.

My coaching services are avialable to you and as gift certificates! My book Smile Across Your Heart: The Process of Building Self-Love can be autographed and shipped anywhere too!

I wish you a relaxing and joyful holiday!

Laurie Martin